I don't know if I have the strength to do this again...another trip to Mayo and more tests. Bladder issues this time. Too many infections too close together. Dealing with infections is my life as far as my health goes. I'm spirit weary and don't want to have to drive down there again. I don't know how much more I can endure, or if I even can endure it any more. It's the old sick-and-tired-of-being-sick-and-tired syndrome.
When I take these trips I feel so alone, even when someone comes with me, they don't come in with me, they don't have to endure the humiliations and the stress, the physical pain and exhaustion. They mean to help but I still have to walk it alone and it's so dispiriting sometimes. I don't want to do this by myself. I don't want to do this at all.
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